Today, we’re diving into a topic that many parents of autistic children and professionals find challenging: dealing with demanding behavior. We’ll explore why some autistic kids might seem overly controlling and what support they need to feel safe and understood.
It’s essential to shift our perspective from seeing autistic children as demanding or controlling to understanding that they are often in survival mode, trying to manage overwhelming situations.
You might have heard of Pathological Demand Avoidance or PDA. Both Sue and I prefer to call it a "demand for autonomy." It’s essential to understand that when autistic individuals avoid specific tasks, it’s not about being pathological or problematic. Instead, it’s about needing control to manage overwhelming tasks.
Why Do Autistic Kids Demand Control?
First, let’s look at the neurological side. The autistic brain works differently, making connections inconsistently. Autistic individuals often need to think through tasks that come automatically to neurotypicals consciously. This process is exhausting and can lead to inconsistent performance. When faced with a demand, they might panic if they can’t immediately recall how to do it or if they're too fatigued.
The Impact of Rigid Teaching Methods...
Many autistic kids are taught through repetitive methods, such as ABA therapy, where they learn to do things in one specific way. This can create rigidity, making them believe there's only one correct way to do things. In contrast, neurotypicals often thrive on flexibility, which can lead to misunderstandings and frustrations.
By recognizing their neurological differences and supporting them with empathy and practical strategies, we can help them feel more secure and less anxious.
Listen to Susan share some strategies you can implement TODAY to support autistic individuals trying to make sense of the world.
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